Lessons from January

 

It's often said that the winter is the season when we naturally turn inwards and give time for ourselves to observe our life and enjoy the coziness of the home environment. This sounds like a luxury period of time if we are lucky to be in balance. The dark Season can be lowering our energy, the lack of light making it more difficult to keep on doing the daily tasks or starting new initiatives. For me the start of the new year is like a shout of freedom. I'm eager to try to elevate my existence with tiny little things or habits that potentially make me happier, healthier and smarter this year. Sounds too good! The thruth is: as the January went on and on, like a never ending story it started to get on my nerves. 

I already had forgotten my book order from the last Autumn, the delivery was for some reason badly delayed. Suddenly I got the package this week and the theme of the book suits very well to January. I started to read the book: "Don't believe everything you think - why your thinking is the beginning and end of suffering". Actually I'm feeling quite good at the moment, maybe this is perfect time for me to read this book.

I like the idea of how the author (Joseph Nguyen) describes the difference of a thought and thinking. Thoughts being neutral observations, insights of intuitive promptings popping in our minds and "just happening" in moments. Thinking is more like a judgement or opinion we have about our thoughts. Thinking is taking a lot of energy, effort and willpower as it is something active that we are doing. We use so much of our energy on unnecessary processing when sometimes just letting go of some of our thoughts would be better. We can choose where we give some extra attention, where the thinking is welcome and neglect this mind game when paying attention is not relevant. This sort of selection needs some awareness and I try to increase this skill of noticing my own patterns by reading interesting books about human mind and philosophy.

 

Many people have been lately sharing their difficulties and struggles copying the grey winter time. The sun has been behind the wall of clouds for so many weeks and the weather in general did not invite to go outside. We can have a wintery mind dip, where the joy is hidden, playing hide and seek with us. It is easy to stuck on our own world, our critics and negatives. Overthinking can be our biggest enemy when just simple starting doing things little by little would give space for joyful moments. We make ourselves so much pressure and increase the low moods by harmful thinking and other bad habits.

In my experience having discipline to try and focus on something that helps you connect with yourself, makes you more relaxed and creative. This sort of joy and commitment will spread to other areas in life as well.

I was never very sporty in my youth and often more focused on the "fun" side of young adult life. But since I started a regular routine with one sport, my interest for healthy lifestyle started to grow over the years. Simply because I felt better and reaching small personal goals gave me more self confidence. I also learned new methods to handle my emotions and obstacles in life, because the fine tuning you need to be able to keep on doing when working with your body is in many ways similar we need to when working with our minds. The patience and taking days of rest when it's needed. 

I was taking part to a run event this month. My goal was to have a balanced 10 kilometer run, enjoy my own rhythm. It's sometimes fun and motivating to run among a group of people, being challenged and invited by the speed of others but still listening your own limits  and  how running simply feels that moment. 

I was happy with my run. I learned that for a balanced run I should not start too fast. I warmed up my feet massaging them with Franklin balls in the morning and had a short meditation, which helped me to focus just on my own run. I often visualize the route and different landmarks, cutting this way the whole route smaller. It helps me to keep on going. I think I'm a bit hooked in this hobby, in a good way!

In my opinion our body is also our mental guide and the action supports the clarity of mind. The whole chemistry of our human body is influenced by our emotions, by our physical actions, by our communication, nutrition, environmental factors and so on. Learning to recognize the aspects that regulate and have influence on our important functions is a constant field of new challenges. We definitely get older and the hormonal changes will challenge our lifestyle. We should try to stay open minded, be able to adjust our behavior when needed and stay focused on our daily journeys.

I'm proud that I've found new positive ways and hobbies which give so much joy.

 

    

It is very human to feel stuck sometimes. With our different personalities, our unique combination of genes, our experiences and the social contexts we live in. 

...It's good to recognize and be aware our own typical patterns of processing emotions...

  but not hold on to those emotions too tight and let them take our energies

 

   

We sometimes stay standing in front of the invisible stop sign,

watching other people and the life passing by, 

 we should rather let that stop sign fall,

and love the moments and chances we are receiving from life 

Little gifts waiting to be taken

The following pictures are from France. We spent our new year there by the Atlantic Ocean in Bretagne. Mostly grey days there also, but wonderful fresh air and fresh food. I was especially impressed of the Fish Market hall with so many options and directly from the Fishermen.

We will be visiting in this place more in the future, because our son moved in this beautiful town.

Vannes

Fishmarket

And back to Amsterdam. This dog did not listen to the owner and knew it's important to appreciate the precious Winter Sun. I was doing the same light ritual standing by the water in Vondelpark with this wise dog.

The January is turning to February, 

the longer days are winning some more space, wind opening the grey curtains,

WELCOME

yellow and green.

 

PS: 

This morning, on the last day of January, I was struggling waking up and almost skipped my yoga lesson. Then I thought I better go anyway, because I will feel better after going there. It was a wonderful slow flow lesson with a theme "Balance". I was focusing on my own practice, but at the same time enjoying the other people doing their thing around me. At the end I felt a bit light headed, but also energized. One person had brought a yoga book with them, written by a mentor of my yoga teacher. I was offered to borrow the book and read it if I wanted. It felt like a surprising gift at that moment. I took the book and I'm curious to read it. Before leaving the room we could choose an inspiration card from the pile of upside down turned cards set on the table. 

I picked one saying: You deserve to receive and give. 

It also said that there should be a balance between being able to receive and give. 

It made me realize that it is easier for me to give than receive. I even hesitated taking that offered book, cos I thought maybe someone else wants to read it first.

Almost every time my yoga lessons are giving me so much insight: body and mind getting more balanced. Almost like surfing on the same wave length with the group and with the teacher. Picking up some answers to my own silent questions.

Looking back to Summer time

These pictures have been patiently waiting for me for a while. They were downloaded on the empty page without any title, reminding me to come back. Weeks have passed and I can see the Summer shades differently with my Autumn mind. I knew some words would come when time goes by. Few lines between the pictures are the missing layers for this story.

I feel protected by the darker September evenings and appreciate now even more the lighter moments from the Summer. We had some challenges, but by focusing on important things and positives, knowing some people were thinking of us and supporting us, we could manage to face the situation and believe everything is going to be all right. Even in the middle of the storms of life, there are many other things worth to notice, memorize and remember. Things that give guidance, energy and joy. The wind of change can push us gently towards the safe harbor to recover and let us grow again and again.

Talking in the garden with my friend in Tammisaari, Finland and being gently supported during the shaky period. It was a right spot to be and being heard gave such a boost for the rest of the Summer.

 A warm nordic afternoon mood in urban landscape of Helsinki.

Me in action

We also had a small round in the centre of Hanko. The warm rocks by the water, a tasty lunch and admiring the views from the old water tower. Simple summer days without any special plans. 

Step by step, day by day was our motto then and it still is. Thinking this way, accepting that every process takes time and in the end we will be there where we need to be and then it's time to step in to the next page.

This year has brought so many new things and turns. The way we react and handle the situations in life are based on what we've learned from our personal experience during the years and how our families have learned to face challenges and communicate. 

I also got a big portion of Sun energy from hot South France. I still remember how I had trouble to sleep in the heat, but how lovely it was to be able to sit late outside and swim in a warm sea. I had plenty of time to read and simply do nothing. My daughter had fun with her friend floating on the waves and snorkeling. They were still like small kids, these young women. 

I feel sometimes I choose to learn some things with intuition and afterwards it seems like the new skills are preparing me to face the upcoming challenges.

Last spring I was taking part to a small meditation course and I took this new habit of meditating to my daily routines right away. I have been very much surprised and thankful by the effect to my focus, calmness and energy levels.

I rather seek peace and serenity every where I visit. Super crowded places are making me nervous and tired. My young travel companions in France only needed the sea, the sun, good food, a lot of relax time and short shopping moments to find some new bracelets to their colorful collection. Maybe Cannes was not a perfect place for me - too tight and touristic. We had a great location for our airbnb in the old part of town near the beach and it was more charming there. We felt a bit like locals.

Cannes

Antibes

 

The train connection along the coast line in South of France is connecting different locations and towns. You can easily visit also Italian Riviera. We spent a bit time in Antibes and I went to see Picasso Museum --very interesting!

Great views near Picasso museum in Antibes

Courage

Sky high dreams and plans

Homecoming

Curiosity leads to some more adventures. Without even noticing the script just continues and we will be surprised of the next chain of moments and new perspectives. Life being faster than we expect, forcing us to find the new balance every day.

I’m ready to let go of the summer and hope to find the brightest colors of Autumn. 

Heartwarming stay in Stellies

Planning a journey is just like making the foundation for the new experience that is going to happen. The motivation behind the trip is directing our mind so that we're able to make an inviting frame for our step out of ordinary life. Visualizing a dream or a goal is almost half of the joy. For me a ideal trip is not full of big plans, maybe one or two ideas or booked activities and the rest of the time some space to make spontaneous decisions depending on the mood and the weather. It is so personal what we want to do on a visit or on a holiday. I can easily listen, read and admire the most exciting adventure stories, but personally enjoy more if I can see and feel how everyday life flows in different places. It is always interesting to get an insider tip for a nice walk in surroundings. 

Like this beautiful walk just around Stellenbosch in ZA. Just behind the sport grounds of Matties rugby stadium. Walking up to a hill and having a beautiful view to the nearby mountains and seeing the colors of the Nature. There are few routes you can walk, even to the top of Stellenbosch Mountain. I would love to walk up there some day. It is mentioned in the  walk reviews that it takes about 7 hours total to walk there and back. 

We saw quite many mountain bikers and joggers during our afternoon walk on the hills. Cute kids cycling with mini mountain bikes, guided by their teacher. 

The Autumn was coming during our visit. You could see the brown leaves in wine yards and how the harvest time was clearly over a few months ago. We were having a relaxing half day at the Lanzerac Spa with my daughter. Just sitting outside and watching the mountain view was just calming. I never really was a Spa type of person, but this time I really needed a good massage to feel like a refreshed person after a long, tiring Dutch winter season. We cycled early in the morning to Lanzerac estate to enjoy our time outdoors and indoors of this pretty spot. 

Our local friend was recommending this other farm estate for our next visit --> Babylonstoren farm retreat

This location has beautiful landscaped gardens and it's one of the oldest farms established in the Cape Winelands region in South Africa. 

I just happen to love gardens and I had to have a nice round in Hortus Botanicus of Stellenbosch as well. I took my daughter with me, she was resisting, but really liked it after all. It was great to see her getting more calm and relaxed just seeing the beautiful flowers, insects and plants. It was worth it!

Meaningful decisions, emerging in a moment, making you wonder. Just being glad about the fact you could surprise yourself just by letting things happen. 

Before trying something new it's better not automatically to think that you're not going to like it and not being able to enjoy. Often just by avoiding that limiting thought and jumping over the invisible fence, we are able to feel more free than ever. Most of the times we can try to rewrite the habitual scenes, overpaint something old and move to the next level - without a fear and feeling more energy. We can learn to let go of some old thoughts and realize that every day really is a fresh start and too much past and too much future while "experiencing TODAY", can have a very limiting effect on us. 

One more great sidestep after having an early breakfast at Ya-Ya Cafe was to visit the nearby Rupert Museum. There we admired the collection of modern South African art.

These paintings were originally made as a commission to decorate a railway station in Johannesburg. The artist (JH Pierneef) wanted to show different beautiful locations of South Africa in his paintings. Stunning landscapes and architecture was presented in this decorative panels.

I really liked the modern, last part of the Rupert museum. The combination of abstract, close-up Nature photography of Oscar Forel (1891-1982) and the installations of Durban-based artist Karla Nixon (born 1990) making a strong abstract atmosphere. The play with light, different materials and textures - magical world created!

delicate paper strip installations by Karla Nixon

Soft and soulful South-African warmth was circulating in the air and it was time to relax and meet some lovely people. We saw our son play two rugby games and it was obvious he enjoyed his busy life with clear goals and daily routines. Even one good friend of his moved here to chase his personal dreams. Great to have a good old friend sharing the experience. 

Small bites of everyday life in Stellenbosch, just what we needed this time. The amount of rest, flexible days with surprising small things, we felt happy that we were able to notice them. 

The best part of everything was just meeting all the people who were part of our son's life & helping him feel home in this different environment, far away from home. With all these meetings my heart is staying even more there, understanding better the way of life and their values there. The social roles and realities can be different, even unfair. Some children playing football just beside the motorway living in a township, others traveling and taking part almost professional looking school teams of all sort of sports. A lot of opposites but also unity, where sport seems to play a big role. I met many open, golden hearted people trying do their best for their own community. Even a school is like a small community, a village of is own, where being respectful and taking part on the activities seems like a joyful thing to do. As a reward you really feel like being part of something, building up something memorable for the rest of your life. 

A good day, a good life starts from the basics, for example having energy giving familiar rituals,

like a delicious breakfast early in the morning.

Pure soulful simplicity!