A Sandy Sunday walk

Many greetings from a sunny and frozen Amsterdam. I have been thinking of you and I wanted to write sooner, but the time was flying and I had other things and missions to do during the last two weeks. This morning is a beautiful one and I will send you some of this positive feeling by showing you some sunday pictures from the beach.

A view from the dunes to Bloemendaal beach

My daughter walking with the stick she found. 

The sun was shining every now and then through the clouds. The atmosphere was surreal.

So many mussels at the beach.

My children like to draw at the beach. Reminded of my own childhood.

A good outdoor walk makes me think more about life. I was smiling and happy seeing so many families having a sunday walk and people being sporty, taking care of themselves. There was no stress to be seen and the wind was like cleaning the mind and airing the brain!

There were many surfers of Sunday. It was lovely to watch even the waves are not so high in Holland.

One thing that I was thinking on my walk:

I went to a Marilyn Monroe exhibition one week ago. This "90 years of Ms.Monroe", showing the collection of personal belongings of this female icon, is making the story of her life somehow understandable in the context of the time she lived in and taking concern of her personal background. The transformation of Norma Jean into Marilyn Monroe is interesting. She had a difficult childhood and she was living in foster homes, because her mother had mental issues and the father was not in her life. She seemed to have a very big need to be accepted, respected and seen. She wanted to become a big movie star and she did it. We see in many ways a ready final product of this charming, blond, seductive actor and make our judgements based on that. The exhibition made me understand that she was not stupid, she worked hard, had many talents and she knew what she wanted and how to use her feminine powers to achieve things. At the same time she went too far I think, and could not be really happy in the end. The image and the icon she was, seemed to be partly made in the cost of her real personality. Maybe that was the only way that time for a lady like her and her background to reach the goal and get the attention. She had the charisma and she had more personal ambition than is seen in the movies and the roles she played. "I do not mind to live in a mens world if I can be a woman in it" is one of the famous expressions of her. At the same time she was crossing some lines and breaking some rules of the feminine roles in the conservative decades. But also using the typical, vamp and the innocent neighbourhood girly appearance to get famous. The sad, mysterious end of her life either a suicide or a murder... goes in a way back to the tragedy of her childhood. 

I have been thinking the femininity and masculinity since I saw this exhibition. How the differences in these natural powers are effecting our lives and how these qualities are both in us, different amounts and melted, mixed...like a the most raw, sensual, vulnerable and deepest qualities in our humanity.   

I think the natural way we are and excist is the most important thing in us to be protected. I just wanted to point this out, because it seems sometimes to be forgotten that we are part of the natural world too and we have to protect and respect ourselves and other people. The social media today seems to be a format for many people to reach out, get the attention, try to get famous and get some feedback from strangers. You can find some support and maybe even real friend there, good people exist :-), but I hope no one does this on a cost of the self respect and the real beauty in us. 

The childhood is an important part of our life. There we have the space to learn and experiment our drives and interests if we are lucky. We get to know our basic self and find our strengths in a supportive environment. Even a difficult childhood gives us a lesson, but can block our creativity and freedom in many ways. But still working on yourself, finding your unique way of life and finding your talents is possible at every age. Letting go of the old patterns and making a change can give a new chances in life.  I feel good, because I know my children are happy and I hope they will also stay good friends as adults.

The circle of life or a straight path of life --- depending on how we want to see it. I see it in both ways: going further to the unknown horizon, maybe having some important stops on our way and  at the same time our life is like circles. We are returning back to the centre of the spiral, collecting the energy from there and following the circle, reaching longer with our personal spiral. I think we always have the opportunity to find back to our original, pure spirit and we have to do this going back every now and then. Strengthening the roots of our existence is feeding the growth of our mind and personality.

Reflecting

A reflection is catching and pointing out the shape of the object and the reflecting surface seems to be like a gate to the other dimension and to the unknown, secret world. As a child one of my favourite fantasy was to wonder and think if I could experience the world up side down. It was fun to watch the ceiling and think how much more interesting the home would be if I could walk there and have that empty, minimal space for running and playing.

This is just an example of how changing the perspective can make the ordinary things more mysterious, beautiful and exciting. And this sort of skill, that we maybe learned as a child in one of those lazy afternoons, when there was nothing to do..is actually one of the most important skills in life. Finding new ways to look at the situation and the world, finding other solutions, changing the direction of our thinking and reflecting ourselves in the social connections with others. This can make us more flexible and "giving" in our relationships with other people and more aware of our environment. We learn so much by watching and imitating the actions of other people or even registering the non living elements around us. 

The neuroscience is studying the meaning of the "mirror neurons" in the contexts of learning empathy, language and understanding the actions of other people. These neurocells were first found from the apes, but the neuroscience is still trying to find the final prove, that we as humans have those cells too. Anyway I like the idea of this ability to mirror the actions of other people by following, imitating, learning from them and this way understanding also our own behaviour better.

The mirroring surface is writing the story of our reality in unexpected ways and making the scenery abstract. The sun is sending a long distance waves, touching gently our planet, reaching sometimes hidden corners and warming up our face in sunny days.

The rain has been making big puddles on the streets during the last week. Like the sky was crying the lost of the warm season or maybe giving a nice shower for the plants and the trees in the nature. And if there would be snow one day, it would powder the naked shapes with the glittering beauty of winter. Until then, I will enjoy the reflections. 

Changing the perspective is keeping us curious and we seem to need these moments in our everyday life too. We have to make decisions based on the information, based on the ethics or how we feel. We want to make the right moves in our personal life and also in a bigger scale. Actually the whole life and existence seems to be like a big, reflecting mystery, which is endlessly changing the form. In the end we have to trust in our own vision and in our own special meaning in this world and find the contexts where some goals can be reached.

Part of the harbour area seen from the North side of IJ-river.

I seem to be in a abstract mood, dropping the words from my mind. Trying the organise the flashes of visions into understandable sentences. 

I crossed the river this week, took the ferry to the North side of Amsterdam. There is so many layers of history to watch in Amsterdam. I like the old houses by the canals, but somehow I am always more fascinated of the modern lines and shapes. I went to visit the film museum EYE to the other side of the Ij-river, opposite the central station. The public transportation boats are taking the locals and the tourists almost non stop speed across the water during the day. You do not have to wait for the next ferry for a long time and the crossing takes about 10 minutes. So near is this reflecting side of Amsterdam where you can admire the City view from distance. In Eye museum you visit the exhibition, go to a movie or just have a coffee in this fascinating house (opened 2012) designed by the Delugan Meissl Associated architects. 

The EYE museum on the left and a new Amsterdam Tor  beside it . The boats transporting people on the right.

The entrance to the film institute EYE

The creativity in us gives endless opportunities for reflecting our inner world and strengthens our bond to ourselves, the other people and the world. My motivation for taking the pictures and writing is also an attempt to try to understand myself better and express how I see the real and unreal. Like this I can have a look to the other side of the mirror, like watching me through the text and via the picture gates. I also like the thought that someone, a person with his or her own vision is seeing my words and giving me company like that - reflecting and mirroring the abstract world we live in. This is our bridge to the other side.

Whispers of wisdom

I want to make an important journey. A journey to my mind. I know I have some acute issues at the moment I have to deal with. I guess we all have every now and then. The nature helps me to empty my mind from the unnecessary sidetracks, but the main track I have to find out myself. This is also seasonal, I feel every autumn a need to focus a little bit how I am and how I relate to the world and people around me. I know there are some rocks on the way, but I have to do this trip. I have been avoiding it too long. I accept I need other people too to face myself and I will be happy to find and hear some wise words and experiences from others. I popped into some wise thoughts during the morning hours and my visit to the book shop. Like...

"As a sensitive person, I can easily get stucked in feelings and start to feel sorry for myself...but sometimes feelings are just part of life and you need to get used to and get over."

"Sometimes happiness really is a choice."

"The difference between a good day and a bad day is your attitude."

I found this book this morning from the book shop and maybe learn how to whisper to my mind. After finding the book I started to smile and trust I can change something if I want to. If I can develop every year a little bit, I can be a decent person one day :-).Normally spoken I am positive, but there are some triggers that are easily shaking this positive side. We have to take care of ourselves and the other people in our lives. Seeing, reading, being good, trying a new tactic and listening can open another chapter in our life and in our mind. 

Green in Black

We are living the season of Colors, I know. I am still waiting for the most colourful days to come. But the fall is also the season of black tones and dark evenings. This is fascinating and interesting, the dark comes fast and wipes away the bright tones.

 

We are doing some painting work at home this week and the black has been present also there in a form of dirt. I have been trying to get away the dark cover of street dust and other fetty oils from the ceiling, trying to get the surface ready for the new layer or bright white. Working on this, I have been thinking how much of this dirt and small particles are landing on top of the green nature outside. We do not necessarily see it, but the plants are also living with this black. The rain will give a cleaning shower every now and then, but how clean is the rain then in the end. The circle of our industrial world is giving also hard time to the nature. Sometimes we seem to forget we are part of this with our actions and short time planning, without seeing the long term effects. We are also victims : we and our children are breathing this air, playing in the water, drinking it and eating too much processed food. 

I went to check the Air Quality Index(AQI) of Amsterdam from the website, which shows always the actual situation in real time all over the world. At the moment it is good here, but this is not the total truth.I found an article, which tells that in many bigger Dutch cities like Amsterdam, Rotterdam and Maastricht, the level of nitrogen dioxide (NO2)is often too high in some areas, going above the EU regulations and making the air unhealthy. This makes me worried and I start to think why on earth did we end into a bigger town and in this small crowded country. We feel the big difference on the air quality every time we visit Finlad, especially in North where I come from the air is very fresh. It is the most dominant thing that we notice after landing and stepping out from the aeroplane in my hometown. I love to live in Amsterdam, but it makes me scared to see all the information of this sometimes unhealthy situation: the quality of the air is the third biggest cause of Death in Holland after smoking and obesity. I did not know that! 

It is good to be aware all of this and when writing the blog, I am talking with my son over this issue. He started to look over how the air quality is in China and other parts of world. I think it is important to talk about these things with the young generation. I want them to grow to respect the nature and live healthy.

I like to see the nature in all tones, but I also love how the black and white pictures are showing more the mystery of our living world, plants and landscapes. The structures of natural art highlighted with the sun and the shadows. If I would be walking inside these pictures, in the black world, I would miss the green and the whole palette of colours. We want to keep the green up and let it live long for the future generations. 

Happy weekend from Amsterdam !!

Painted by Autumn

The same park can look so different depending on the day or the Season. I was walking yesterday with my Camera and wanted to capture the colours and the soft light from a cloudy, windy day. The green life was calm under the trees and by the water. I was very much surprised how wonderful tones I found. Only a few yellow autumn leaves here and there. The most impressed I was of the blue and grey tones combined with some "still green" leaves. How beautifully all the living forms were mirroring from the surface of the water, admiring themselves. The branches of the trees were reaching under the water, like bathing and greetings some life, that I could not see through the water. The autumn seems to decorate every spot now. The asphalt is getting slippery and the treasures of Nature are  there to be seen and collected...before it will be cleaned or slowly loosing the colours and getting invisible brown.

This morning I went jogging and made an extra round at the park after that. I wanted to collect something with me, have something to take home...autumn on my table. I found some nice leaves and thought we have to come back with the children to do some more investigation on the ground level. We can do some decoration at home and the best materials are often free - like the pretty Autumn collection outside. 

Here is some of the treasures I was taking home! Leaves for me and leaves for you for this weekend !! The FEEL GOOD world is there for us, ready to help us to see things in a more healthy scale and what is important in life. 

I have to tell in the end something. The life is sometimes surprising in a nice way. Like yesterday, when I was having my walk. A mother that I know from the school of my children came across at the park. We stopped and had a very nice talk over the Nature and how it helps us to see the beauty in life and how we are part of it. You do not have necessarily this sort of talks at the school yard when picking up the kids. This showed me again how the nature can help us to open up and be more present in a moment and show more the soft side in us. It seem sometimes that the nature is taking the facades down and we do not have to pretend anything or try to be something. It is sad, that for some people because of the poorness or conditions they are living, this connection and healing side of the Nature can be unreachable or even impossible to have. But for many people it is also a choice, which they might have forgotten in the middle of the busy life or something that they never learned. I am happy that I was taken to the walks in the woods as a child. That's how I learned a fundamental way to relax and how to let go off the stress and let your mind be free even for a moment. It is a good choice to add more walks and Nature moments in our life. 

-Erja